“The good news is that you have my favorite disease.”
“My transplant team. Gotta love ‘em.”
“We’d get more respect if they didn’t call this ‘surgical garb’.”
You are here, but you should be here.
“Saline! Saline! Over the ocean blue.”
“I knew she’d pull through. She’s a real fighter.”
“Is there nothing without a company logo?”
Grand Rounds/Ground Rounds
County Hospital Admissions/Denials
“‘Keep it elevated’ refers to the leg, not the blood alcohol level.”
“And now, my mother, Mrs. Knable, will put you to sleep with tales of her arthritis.”
“Oh, please. I’m sure I’m not the only heart surgeon who has ever cut himself shaving.”
“I’ve treated a lot of cases like yours, so maybe I’ll have some luck this time.”
You Are Here…But You Should Be Here
“You’re at a teaching hospital. Hence, all the tests.”
“Sorry. I was listening to Car Talk during surgery.”
“Please get well soon. You were doing the work of four men.”
“I’m here to check you vitals, not your vittles.”
“Kids, while your mom is in the hospital here’s a loaner.”